April 2008
59 posts
My Grandma makes aprons and sells them on the... →
Is a runaway feelin' about as big as the sky?
I usually go through my fair share of musical obsessions, but they come and pass. Sometimes I come back to them (Britney Spears) and sometimes I don’t (Deena Carter). Right now I can’t get enough My Morning Jacket. This sick love affair has been going on for months and it cannot be stopped. Every song makes me want to pack my shit, buy a station wagon and get the hell out of here. And...
“My feet smell quite awful today.”
– Late afternoon text from Kristine.
Power!
Last May, my best friends forever and I all met in Vegas for a long weekend of fun and much needed time together. Our last night was spent at Pure – jamming out to the spinning sounds of Wilmer Valderrama and hanging out with some pretty interesting people. One of which, told us he was filming a ballroom dancing movie in Hong Kong and wanted to take photos of us to send to the director so we could...
Spacy
I took the N train to Union Square tonight to meet Molly and Spence for the 7PM show of Baby Mama. At 57th Street, a man got on - he was wearing all black, gold sparkly sun glasses, and had two springs coming out of his hat that had suction cups taped to the ends. He also was carrying a saxophone.
The man shook his head around making the springs bounce and jiggle before giving his speech.
Hi...
Friday afternoon
Custodian Man: Hello, miss! How you like working here?
Me: I LOVE IT!
Custodian Man: You plan on being here long?
Me: Yes, why?
Custodian Man: Well, because you were recommended to be the fire marshal of your floor! Your job would be to make sure everyone is out in the case of a fire.
Me: Sweet! I feel like I could be good at this job...wait, who recommended me for this?
Custodian Man: You're just a nice young lady!
So I signed a piece of paper, and now I'm in the running for the title of FIRE MARSHAL of the 6th floor. I hope I win!
Games! Lists! Fun!
I’ve been asked to reveal 6 random things about myself. I love games!
I used to throw major temper tantrums when I was little. I would hide under my bed and scream bloody murder, cry and roll around. My dad would come in and take pictures of me, which would really piss me off. Sometimes I wish I could throw tantrums just like the old days - except it’s impossible to go underneath my bed and...
It's back...
I just sat down to watch Grey’s and immediately freaked out.
First - The opening song was Lykke Li, my newest favorite. I have the biggest girl crush on her, ever.
Second - George! Killing cockroaches left and right! Just like me! Although I scream and swear a lot more.
Third - I have Izzy’s haircut. Seriously. Exactly. I can’t wait to see how she styles it when it’s...
Wait, I take that back. I can wait for my next... →
secretradio:
(via fuzzyjensen) Fuzz, two questions. 1) Carry mace. If you already do, carry double-barrel mace. I know that wasn’t a question, but I fear for your safety. 2) Do you have ANY IDEA why Lloyd Koulen was so angry at you? Other than him being being batshit insane? I’m fascinated by this.
1) I know karate. Actually, I don’t. But I think I could break this man in half...
Wait, I take that back. I can wait for my next... →
Seriously?
My coworkers and I just treated ourselves to a trip to the pet store to gawk at the puppies. As we stood making up names for the shit-zu and puggle that were fighting, something hit my back. I looked down to find a tiny bottle of Visene sitting next to my foot, still moving from the hit. I looked up to see a man dressed head-to-toe in white standing in front of me. He was staring intensely into my...
“I am officially done with classes. Now, just two weeks of complete and total...”
– Voicemail from Kristine. She’s almost a 3L, oh boy!
“Fuzz, seriously. We’re not used to the beginning stages…it’s...”
– Lilly
FSM
Last night Molly, Nora and I went to see Forgetting Sarah Marshall. We tried to go to the 7:00 show at Union Square, but it was sold out. Maybe it was because there was a homeless man wandering around Union Square wearing a Forgetting Sarah Marshall t-shirt. Free press! We ended up power walking to Chelsea and made the 7:10 show no problem. We even got tons of treats with time to kill.
The movie...
Heart explosion
Two of my coworkers just took me to a pet store around the corner that they frequent. The pet store has pug puppies. I had butterflies the entire time.
My top weakness in life is a little chunky pugger. If you buy me one, you will win my heart.
Drool and dreams
This morning I fell asleep on the train while listening to Danity Kane. Soothing sounds, right? I woke up to the sound of the entire contents of my bag spilling onto the dirty subway floor. It was embarassing. I’ve already drank half my venti coffee, but my eyes will not stay open. I gots a bad case of the Mondays.
WatchMolly reads us the email she sent to a potential future Craigslist roommate. She won an interview based on these words. And this email, combined with her in person charm, got her an offer on the apartment!
I have a new skill
An hour ago I was given two logos and a line of text and was asked to make one master logo. Actually, it was more of a “challenge” they put me up to.
I love challenges. Duh. I always need to accomplish and come out on top. And today, with my life line being a call to Hannah, I accomplished. I made a logo.
Baby comes home!
This weekend I will be purchasing a new baby Macbook. I’m very excited. While Google imaging “Macbook” for fun, I came across this. Woof!
Kayla got her new computer in the mail yesterday. This morning as we pulled ourselves together for work, part of her routine included opening up her futon and putting her laptop inside. The paranoia has not subsided. Will it ever? I forgot to...
Fwd Fwd: Funny!
Kristine’s mom sent her an email with an attachement. The email said: I figured you and MC would like this one.
Kristine forwarded it to me and it made me laugh non-stop for twenty minutes. I will present to you some highlights from the said attachment entitled, How to Poop at Work.
CROP DUSTING: When farting, you walk briskly around the office so the smell is not in your area and...
Dreams
Kayla: i had a bad dream that chris took a secret trip to LA and met a girl named sue wagner and had an affair w/ her. UGH!
Kayla: SUE WAGNER
Me: SUE!
BIG Idea.
lillyjensen: Fuzz and I have a BIG idea. Actually, it’s an idea we had a few years ago, but we’re revisiting and breathing new life into it. I’m so so excited. We’ll have to keep it on the DL for now, but expect big things from us in the next year. BIG things. So big - huge. Give us one year. Tops.
“GIRL! YOU ALWAYS SMILE!”
– A man outside my building grabbed me on my way to lunch and yelled this in my face.
My dad just emailed me
Subject: The Future
Dear Fuzz,
Scientists are saying that the future is going to be far more futuristic then they had originally predicted.
M Jensen
“Can I call you back? I’m driving to Green Bay with John - Gus is on my lap...”
– Kristine. I guess she has to wait to hear my amazing news!
“How many calories does poop have? I mean, someone has to have tabulated that by...”
– My roommate, who wishes to remain anonymous.
Someone should...
Write a book called How to Combat your ADD, and give it to me along with an Adderall.